my least favorite question

Jadah Foster

What are you?

a question i am often asked,

a question i hate answering

as the easiest answer is:

it’s complicated.

What are you?

eyes of prospective friends and new coworkers linger upon my nose

as if examining relics unearthed, as if my nasal framework might be

the next exhibit in the museum of mixed heritage

displaying tapestries of cultures intertwined

Yes, but what are you?

the tone often cuts not out of curiosity but irritation

unable to define me, the asker can’t peg it

the expression on their face usually contorted; like i am a complicated equation

the asker unable to find what i(x) represent(s)

What are you?

the gas station clerk means to ask, but as usual, murmurs:

Your eyes are so exotic.

Where do they come from?

and inwardly i cringe

focusing on the scent of gasoline

and the sound of the automated lotto machine

because i know what comes next

You’re hot for an Indian

as if my ethnicity is a prize, fetishized

the origin of my eyes; a mystery to be solved

a riddle for man to conquer

Ok, but what are you?

sometimes, i, too, am not sure

grappling the same question

what am i, what will i be

the question keeping me awake at night; the question of my potential interrupts

dreams like a tv blaring late

commercials intruding on my fragile thoughts

No, really, what are you?

the grad school application gives me eight options:

AsianEuropeanIndigenousAfrican-AmericanMixedRaceLatinxPrefernottosayOther

and somehow that is supposed to sum up the entirety of my existence every freckle

and mole

my double jointedness

the way i speak with the side of my mouth

every mannerism and quirk

every ancestor compressed into a single checkmark

what am i?

i am not the missing piece in your stupid puzzle

not one of the eight checkable boxes

not a number represented by a letter

not a shade on your palette

i am outside the confines of names and lines

a story unfinished

an essence undefined

a mosaic of thousands of faces before mine

i am the complexity that thrives beyond your question.

Jadah Foster is a budding poet and a dedicated fourth-year psychology major, weaving her love for language with insights from her studies of the human mind. Inspired by poignant works like Flowers for Algernon and The Perks of Being a Wallflower, she explores emotional depth and connection in her writing. On weekends, you can find Jadah rewatching The Office (for quite literally the 27th time), finding joy in its humour, or snuggling with her beloved dog, Lola. With her unique perspective and passion for poetry, Jadah is poised to leave her mark on the literary landscape.